I am soooo not a pro

This dating thing is just not in the cards for me...I'm starting to think I'm not cut out for it. Is it me? Is it something I said? Is it them? Who knows.

I think what gets me the most annoyed and frustrated is the lack of closure. As a Type A and a "planner" I like things to be put nicely in their place. If you don't like me, let me know. If you do not want to see me again, you should probably tell me. I don't do the dilly-dally thing. It doesn't take me long to realize whether I like something...and I will always be up front with you.

Needless to say, I'm 99.9% sure I will not hear from K again. Disappointing, yes. Sad? Very much so. I was not prepared for this, and am still shocked at how much it hurts. He is a amazing guy...and someone I easily could have gotten serious with. I was picturing so many things in my present and future, and he was part of all of it. I know it may seem strange after only 1 date and some texting/emailing...but for me it was almost love at first sight. And I have no idea what happened in all honesty. Maybe it was something I said. Maybe he had his guard up. Maybe I'm not what he's looking for. I highly doubt that last one...not because I am overly-confident...but I felt it and I know he is interested. So, I will most likely never know if I did something wrong. The truth?? If I did something that upset him, he should tell me about it. We had an very real connection and immediately hit it off...I thought it was the beginning of something phenomenal.

Even if I did say or do something wrong...The One wouldn't let that stop him from pursuing me. The One won't let anything stop him from winning my heart.

Sigh. I'm through with match.com for awhile. I don't have it in me to go on another date right now. I have other things to concentrate on anyway. I was so sure this thing with K had potential...and if I'm that wrong about something then perhaps I have no business putting myself out there!!

I want love...I want the real deal. And I think I deserve it...scratch that, I DO deserve it. And I know I am so willing to give it as well. I sure hope The One is on his way to finding me...I'm finally ready and want to share my life with someone.

Sorry to disappoint the readers in that there won't be any dates or boys to chronicle on the blog. But I'll try to keep you entertained somehow! :)